Saturday, January 17, 2009

Expectations

If pregnancy has taught me one thing, it's that people try to project their own experiences/views onto me. I do not appreciate that (because they are generally negative). But hold that thought...

So I am expecting a busy, busy weekend. I knew I'd better get in some mileage before it began or it would go by and I'd have no mileage to show for it -- and that would tick me off. So I did 2 miles on the treadmill this morning. It was below 20 degrees outside, yet it was a balmy 40 degrees in the garage. Thanks heavens (and Chasen!) for the treadmill.

Back to the expectations. I think I have just about "reached my limit." I have endured politely all sorts of labor/delivery/new mom horror stories. Gee, thanks, "friends." I say this: It's a good thing I know that everyone is different, otherwise I'd be all "gloom and doom" about the events to come. I am going to have to start dishing out a dose of frank positivity and shut the nay-sayers up! :) Why must people be so negative?

When you tell someone you're going to run a marathon, they are generally very supportive, whether they're a runner or not. The occasional person will tell you that you're crazy, but you know they're just envious. Point blank, I am very tired of the fatalistic view of parenthood that I have been hearing from many, many sources (non-runner sources, just for the record). Gosh, am I going to have to rid my life of all non-runners? Let's hope not.

10 comments:

Jodi said...

Thank you SO MUCH for convincing me to cut my hair short. It feels so strange yet so free! I love running in short hair, and your recommendation to Locks of Love made it feel well worth it. You're the best Susan!

Petraruns said...

Susan - I know exactly what you mean and you know what? As they say in the UK - sod them. Ignore it. Yes life changes and you probably don't sleep as much. But I can't conceive of life without my children and the love and happiness and colour they bring to my life. They challenge me and they force me to be in the now and to be the best person I could be. I fall far short but my love for them and their love for me means I will keep on trying.

Just tell everyone what you think - and then tell us what happened...

Lisa said...

Give me the names & addresses of these "non-running nay sayers" and I'll take care of everything! =)

I feel relatively safe in saying that dealing with others who try to inflict their point of view about pregnancy & parenthood IS the most painful & unpleasant part of pregnancy & parenthood.

Motherhood for me is like the last .2 miles of the marathon -- it's that glorious feeling of accomplishment and pride that completely overshadows the pain & struggle of the previous 26. The struggles, the pain, the strong finish -- it all comes together & blends into 1 moment that if you could separate any of it, you wouldn't really want to. I know you know what I'm talking about.

Pity the nay sayers -- they have NO idea. You're going to do GREAT and Isaac is SO blessed!

Road Warrior said...

We runners tend to have a different perspective on things than a lot of people. Funny how getting out in the fresh air and getting exercise will make our outlook a bit brighter, eh?

ShirleyPerly said...

Funny, I've had some women tell me the opposite about how much I'm missing out on life by choosing not to have kids of my own. Stick to your guns and ignore them. You are in charge of your life and your happiness. Those who complain about their situation are the ones with the problem, not you.

Newly and Forever, Tamantha said...

I don't have kids...but you would be surprised at the number of people that expect me to have them AND be single!....geez...I've concluded that there is always someone who has their own expectations of what I should or should not be doing...point is...I'm the only one living my life. They may mean well, but sometimes people don't have any sense of boundaries!

Tammy said...

Girl, just keep doing what your doing!!! As long as you listen to the body that's all that matters. If you feel good and it's for you always go for it!! I think you look mighty beautiful and your amazing. Your have accomplished so much. You are going to be a terrific mom, I admire you for doing what you do and what you have accomplished, soon when your baby gets older, you guys can run together :D. (My son wants to train with me this spring, isn't that great!

lizzie lee said...

Susan, I can relate totally to your feelings. You have the right attitude. Being positive in life is a gift and a blessing, so enjoy because you have it.

sincere-lee
lizzie lee

milebymile said...

Oh, Susan, I'm so sorry you're running into this. But I'm proud of you for knowing who to listen to--as a rookie mom (much like a rookie runner, come to think of it!), this skill will be VERY useful. See, you're showing Isaac that you're already becoming a good mother.

K

MarathonChris said...

You have embarked on one of the most wonderous journeys in life!!! Let no one interfere with your own bright expectations.

You and Chasen are going to be great parents! I can't wait to hear about your life adventures!